THE LONG AND SHORT OF PENISES ON THE RUNWAY

Originally published February 18, 2015 for StandardHotels.com

In case you missed it, the fashion cult rock star Rick Owens had Paris in a titter last month when he sent several of his male models down the runway with some very strategically placed holes. In other words, their ding-dongs were swinging on the runway like church bells on Armistice Day.

If our research serves correct, this is actually the first time a designer has intentionally employed old Richard Johnson as part of the look, a decision Mr. Owens described as, "puerile." It is not however the first time the phallus has stolen the show. Herewith, a few other cocks of the walk.

Rick Owens (2015)

Definitely wearing this to Burning Man in the spring.

John Bartlett (2002)

He closed the show with models Brad Koenig and Johnny Beyer holding nothing but surf boards. They didn't quite land that turn. Oops. According to NY Mag, John wanted to have the entire finale nude, but the model bookers said no. Prudes!

Model Chad White

OK, so no flesh, and the authenticity is a little dubious, but what is he smiling about, eh?

Isabel Mastache (2010/11)

Penis pants! Watch the video here.

Walter van Beirendonck (1997-98)

I remember two things about 1998. It was the year Seinfeld ended and the year I got my first pair of penis-printed underwear by my favorite Belgian bear fashion designer.

A Parody?

Funny or Die made this parody video, which suddenly doesn't seem that outlandish does it?

The End